Monday, January 10, 2011

Life is what you make it. Always has been, always will be.

Life is way too short. I have been in this slump lately. I have been trying to figure out what I want mostly in my life, for my business and  for my home. Who I want to be, what I want to become. But it all comes down to Life is short so stop trying and just DO. Instead of telling myself I will lose weight by a certain date, or I will become a better photographer by next year, I just need to do it now. I need to start make those changes NOW and stop worry about what it is going to take to get there.

I hate making New Year’s resolutions because I know myself and I know I won’t keep them. It is what it is. I have been through so much in my life which makes me  mad that I haven’t done this earlier. I know how short our stay is on this planet, how valuable our time is, but I have taken life for granted. I haven’t lived for the now, most days I am stuck in the past or just “planning” for the future, but take no action. That ends now!

I have been afraid to throw myself out there, for the fear of what others would say or think, but does that really matter? Not really, not at all! As long as I am happy, my husband supports me and my kids are well taken care of, with of course being happy than why does anything else matter?

I am going to take this year for myself and get my priorities straightened out. I am not going to compare my work to other photographers. I often sit and waste way to much time staring at other peoples work or wondering how they got that shot. It is just wasted time and can be detrimental to ones business. What I offer is unique and original. But most of all what my clients are getting is me! I would like to think I am pretty cool person with a great personality, so not only are you paying for my work and the end product to have forever, but you are paying for me!

Wouldn’t that be nice in every profession to get paid for just being you and doing a good job? Maybe in a perfect world but that is not the case in most places. I would like to think I have been giving this neat opportunity to be me and to give back the talent I was blessed with. I have been given this opportunity to be a better person all around. Last year was a hectic one. Ha! When I wrote that I just laughed, who am I kidding, every year has been hectic for at least the last 10 years, maybe my whole life. It is something I have just gotten used to. That doesn’t mean I know how to handle it better, because that is far from true. But I have learned to get use to it and to just expect it. Last year was my first year in 13 years that I didn’t work at a place of business. I have had a job since I was 14 years old. I would ride my dirt bike to work before I got my license. Man, those were the days. Last year I also had my beautiful daughter. It was also the first year I decided to put all my eggs into one basket and focus on my photography business. I honestly never expected to be as busy as I was. In the midst of it I was just trying to keep my head above water and get my clients their pictures back, which in return left less time for my husband and kids. I don’t regret that at all because it taught me a lesson. It showed me how I will need to plan for the busy season, plan for my life, and have more structure in-between the both of them so that I can function properly, while still keeping everyone happy.

This year I am going to try and do it right, do it better. Actually I don’t think there is ever a “right” way. You can always plan for something to turn out differently or better, but sometimes that just doesn’t happen. Either way, whatever comes out of this year I will claim it. This is my life and I will make it work no matter what. I do vow to spend more time with my kids and less time in front of the computer. They are only young once. I learned last year that it is much harder to be a stay at home mom and also work from home. It would be 10x easier for me to go out there and get another job, but I honestly feel that is not where I am supposed to be right now in my life. I am supposed to be at home with my children. And because of them I will work hard at my photography business this year. I will work hard at being a better mother, a better wife, and a better person. That is the only thing I can promise anyway.

I hope that you all stick around on this journey with me, where ever it may lead. I am ready for the ride.

Life is what you make it. Always has been, always will be.

 

sonsJan_2010 01 22_0590

It was dark…

SonsJan_2010 01 23_0639

but now I see the light…

3 comments:

I'm Not So Perfect said...

Hannah, my friend, and my photog...
I want to tell you that I Love You!
I know we have had some converstations about you second guessing yourself and your work.
You have to understand that you are coming from a background of no formal education of photography. You are teaching yourself the wonderful art of photography. You can see that in your work. Your passion is what drives you. So when you compare yourself to others work, understand that you are starting off and learning from every shoot that you do. Take a class here and there from other photographers. Don't be scared. Don't let fear stand in the way. Sometimes fear can get the best of us and we can miss what God is trying to show or give us.
I'm here to support your work. ILY<3

nmoneill said...

Hannah......I love it! Totally agree about the wanting to be a better mom and wife......and New Years resolutions. With this new year I have this need to do sooo much and I am ready for it...........but getting overwhelmed at the thought of how much it is. So, I am going to try and take it week by week. BTW......how do you get your pictures so show so big? I am just starting my Blog, and really want the pictures bigger. Thanks!

Mama Sons said...

Thank you both for the support. Nichole, it is all very overwhelming, and some days I have to take it hour by hour, but we will all get through it and hopefully be better people in the end. I do my blog through windows live writer. That way my pictures can be as big as I want and then it just plugs my post into blogspot. let me know if you need help.
Anya, you are a great friend and an awesome client. I am very grateful for you.